Snowmen assemble rally for equal rights. Government says "snow way."

At the hight of the Occupy Wall Street movement, local snowmen push to obtain normal constitutional rights, including the right to bear tree branch arms. Celebrity spokesperson for the movement, Frosty the Snowman, states: "No longer should we be forced to smoke corncob pipes, and wear old silk hats that make us begin to dance around!"

Government officials agree that the motion is "just another example of homeless freeloaders hoping to get a hand out." Motion vote fails 97-1.

Local OWS martyr, Michael Tike, dies protecting a political assembly in a field normally occupied by undisposed dog waste and homeless people.

Local authorities state that "Mr. Tike was rubbish that the city has neglected to take out for years."

Due to recent recycling laws, State DA seeks a hefty fine from the city, stating: "If the city doesn't take recycling seriously, who will?" Rhetorical question remains unanswered.