![](http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-p1WwmKabCKA/Tt-ibB3dS6I/AAAAAAAAAsw/iSCIiwClqQU/s1600/pills.png)
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Landfill victorious in lawsuit against national musical group, The Black Eyed Peas.
Judge states: "It is no coincidence that the B.E.Ps happen to have the same steez as this 83 year old landfill."
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Truth Time: Hi, my name is Idiot.
I post ads on craigslist, then never reply to said ads. I really want to sell my things, but the qwerty keyboard is foreign and therefore scary to me, so I must refrain from any sort of reply via email. The good news is, if I ever do get over my fear of the United States standard character arrangement for typewriters and keyboards dating back to 1873, I will lividly inform you that the item is no longer available for sale. I'll then proceed to leave my ad up for the remainder of the 45 days that craigslist allows before removing it from their database, finding myself annoyed at the overabundance of emails i will continue to receive over the duration of this time period. The word "edit" is wildly alien to me, and don't even get me started on "delete."
Dad's deceased son to face lifetime sentence for invading top secret airspace.
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Local "bad boy" found beaten, and then arrested. Neighbors relieved.
You've just won an Andes Award for" "Good Internet Attitude." (Award farted on.)
Local child deemed "strong contender" for next year's Andes.
Monday, March 28, 2011
Local man "tagged" as hamburger on internet. Neighbors outraged.
Sunday, March 27, 2011
Award winning resident Doug Table divorced immediately after supper. Loses award in settlement.
Ex-Wife Priscilla Table-Hande states: "He's disgusting. He left crumbs everywhere and I couldn't take it anymore!" (Restraining order pending.)
Saturday, March 26, 2011
Monday, March 21, 2011
Truth Time: Uncle Rick is a drag.
This is my Uncle Rick. Because my Grandmother recently decided to marry a younger man with a son, I have to call this sucky kid Uncle and treat him with respect. He doesn't even have a pickup truck to let me sit in the back of when we go on beer runs. Nor does he listen to heavy metal tapes, and on my birthday he didn't even get me the Megadeth t-shirt I wanted. I just got a card with a check that was from the both of them, even though I got the same $25 bucks that I got last year before she even met him.
Sunday, March 20, 2011
Truth Time: Godson Matthew sucks.
This is my Godson, Matthew. From the look of it, you'd never be able to tell that this baby is a fucking idiot. This kid totally sucks, and I have to buy him presents anyways. What do you get a three year old kid who doesn't know shit about anything?
Saturday, March 19, 2011
Friday, March 18, 2011
Thursday, March 17, 2011
I'd like to with present you with the Andes award for: "This dick isn't as scary as you'd think (1982)."
You've also won the Andes award for: "Best use of show me that good finger, (aka Flying Fickle Finger of Fate)."
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Presenting the Andes award for: "Best excellent blog consisting of entirely facetious material." (Single award, must be shared or divided.)
We'd like to accept this award on behalf of ourselves. We couldn't have done it without us, and would like to thank ourselves for all the support.
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Saturday, March 12, 2011
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)